is this really me?

trust.

to give you the whole of my heart believing that you'll guard it with all your soul; i've always wished to give your heart the best i can too. things are often so much easier said than done that words don't seem to carry much of a value anymore until the day they're transformed into heartfelt actions. appreciate all the times you took a step back and tolerated me. dear self, you've got to show it if you really mean it. 

Awesome music

is awesome :)

New found phobia.

i've got to admit driving was never really my thing (despite passing my driving test the first time itself without extra money out of pocket woots), and ever since the accident it might have gotten worse :( whatever distance i used to keep with the car in front of mine is times two or even three now. 

there's always this creepy feeling in me that i'll never get to brake my car in time. come to think of it, it's been seven months since i've actually really started driving now, and it took me a while before i gathered enough courage to go onto the fast lane for the first time (no thanks to the jam to and fro sunway), then i slowly got used to it. but sigh, after the accident happened, i kinda reverted back to my old self where i would just choose to stay on my left.

plus my sister who just came back from her undang test yesterday feeling mentally disturbed by some gruesome accident videos they showed them, her stories just didn't help at all. sadly, i'm also back to my very stiff self when i was driving, where i can barely even engage myself in a proper conversation with anyone when the car's in motion. *sister's gonna get more sleeping time in the car! Lol* 

on a serious note, i've gotta drive more and explore more roads to get rid of the stiffness when i drive AND to be better with my sense of direction! 

feeling so much tension just talking about driving. so i shall end this post with a cute pic of Ador and sister's balloonie :3 baby Ador is just so adorbzzzz nobody can ever resist. 

*kiss on the cheek heh :P 

there is something about you that mesmerises me :) 

Because we're nawee enough.

old picture but that's exactly how you always make me feel - happy from the inside out.
*something is crawling on top of your head O_O

known this girl for more than a decade now... every now and then when i think of that one day when we'll have to meet at the airport to bid farewell, my vision will suddenly be blurred by the stubborn tears. i am secretly hoping that i can somehow dry up my tears before the day arrives so at least i'll get to see her clearly for that very last few moments before the next time we meet. the thought of not having her 5 minutes away from home is just... odd. what do i do on a quiet Saturday evening when she suddenly comes to my mind... no more "heyy, let's meet up for an hour, one hour only ar", when we miss each other too badly but at the same time need to finish work. so many things are going to be different next year, i'll probably be a hardcore worker somewhere, she'll be far far away pursuing her dream, by then i presume our perception towards life might also have changed, the new people we meet, new challenges to embrace, new environment to adapt to, new goals to achieve... all this while, she's been such a gem to me and i appreciate her presence in all the chapters of my life thus far. be it the crazy happy emo nerdy playful times, i'll never want to replace any of them with any other thing because they are what made us into who we are today. 

Happy 21st Birthday Wen :) 

Stressszz mode!

i wonder if i've lost some ability to do assignment OR have the assignments in year 3 just gone tougher OR have i just set higher expectations for my work done? somehow, i'm really looking forward to finishing this assignment, then byebye to you FCR2 for now, because hello :) it's the start of our mid-sem breaaak! as usual, with mid-sem break comes a special to-do list. in just that short one week's time, let's see what can be done.

by the way, thinking about you really makes me smile :) 

The one.

i know by heart how much you love and care for me, and i only wish to shower you with more love and bring you all the joy in the world so your days will be filled with smiles. 

And it all started with a smile.

mum told me that little sister said if i wasn't her sister, she wants to be best friends with me. *totally triggered the sentimental side of me. sobs. 

i heart you, bee.